How Do I?

Prod. by Trent Davis

This girly tryna send me down a spiral
and I got emotions for her but I'm tryna hide those
and she's seductive, I know I should keep my eyes closed
but it's hard to deny something that lives inside your bones
So I'm chasing her, tryna hide me tracks
Doing things, tryna fight regret
paranoid I start looking back
Darkness winning inside my head
Do you feel like what I'm feeling like right now?
Even in the silence my guilt is screaming out
But this girly is so pretty that I cannot leave her
she keeps saying that she's harmless why do I believe her?
I need her now and I'm trapped in Neverland
makin' the same mistakes, call me peter pan
and I'm feeling like I am a slave
Same process, same results am I insane?
But there again she is calling out my name
I try to fight it but again I just obey (Dang!)
And now I'm crying out:
Please please, send me light!
Why can't I just get this thing right?
I feel like a deaf man losing my sight
How do I, How do I win this fight?
And now I know that it don't cost a thing to buy captivity
what used to be my favorite necklace has become a leash
I pull and pull and pull and yet there's no release
I used to think you were a beauty but you are a beast,
I'm bleeding but you don't care.
Down here pleading to your blank stare
So demeaning it's just not fair tryna see beyond your long hair
and you've just got my mind so full of doubts
can I call on Heaven someone help me out! All I know is wherever you say, that's where I'm going
I used to have my dignity but now I can't control this
And I don't know if anyone can clean this mess
and I have heard a wicked soul never finds rest
And now I'm crying out:
Please please, send me light!
Why can't I just get this thing right?
I feel like a deaf man losing my sight
How do I, How do I win this fight?
(Oh someone send me light, I'm gonna get it right, I'm seeing through your lies, and you know I'ma fight)
Please please, send me light!
Why can't I just get this thing right?
I feel like a deaf man losing my sight.
How do I, How do I end this fight?